Name

Description

Best Used For

Advantages

Disadvantages  

Separation

Separated, but not
divorced.

-    Couple does not want
t     to divorce for
r     religious or other
r     reasons

      Can have child
s     support,maintenance,
a     and property
s     settlement

-      Gives children and
s       spouse time to adjust

      Gives couple time to
       settle property

May retain health
insurance

       May prolong
        process

        May be more
        expensive

       "New life" may not
        be possible

Pro-Se

Divorces filed
without the
assistance of an
attorney.

      Couples with few
      disputes

      Couples with few
      assets – and those
      easily divisible

      Childless couples

Inexpensive

Fairly quick

May make legal
mistakes

May make
financial errors
calculating support
or division of
property & debt
allocation

No professional
help on legal,
financial or
emotional issues

Mediation

Couple uses a
mediator to help
voluntarily settle
disputes over issues.

Voluntarily settle
disputes over issues.
Mediator may help
draw up paperwork.

Mediator may or
may not be an
attorney.

Couples who have
issues to settle, but
nothing that has to
go to court

Can be less
expensive than
traditional method

Neutral third party,
experienced in
mediation

Less
adversarial

No one
completely "on
your side"

Not appropriate if spouse becomes
difficult

May need to
resort to
traditional divorce

Either party (or
both) may decide
to retain attorney

Even if mediator is an attorney, each may need review of paperwork by
separate attorney
(QDROs, etc.)

Single
Attorney for
Couple

One spouse retains a
single attorney to file
for divorce.

All paperwork
completed and filed
by attorney.

Note: Ethically,
attorney may only
represent one party.

Reasonable,
amicable divorces

Less expensive than
2 attorneys

Less adversarial

Can be a fairly quick process

One party has the
benefit of legal
advice, the other
does not

Not appropriate if
divorce becomes
difficult

Traditional

Each spouse has
their own attorney.

Situations where
spouse is difficult,
non-cooperative

Divorce has legal
issues that require
expert advice

Someone completely
on your side

Expert confidential
legal advice

Traditional approach

Can be adversarial

Can be expensive

Is not always a
cooperative
experience

May become a
longer process

Can destroy the
emotional and
financial facets of the family

Collaborative

Each side has
attorney.

Each side has access
to or is required to
use other specialists
(coaches, child
coaches, financial
experts, etc.).

All professionals
have been trained in
collaborative process.
All agree to
collaboration and
work together to
resolve issues.

If this fails, all
professionals
withdraw, and the
spouses retain other
counsel -- and
professionals -- and
may go to the
traditional divorce
method or other
method.

Couples who wish
to keep divorce
private and avoid the loss of control over their family and money in open court.

Less expensive than
a traditional contested

May be more
productive

Each party has a
person looking out
for their best interests

Not appropriate if spouse becomes
very difficult

If process breaks
down, spouses
will need to retain
new attorneys